Test Drives and Sex Drives

"You have to take test drives before you buy a car.”
a.k.a.
“You need to have sex before marriage” (some think a little, some think a lot, some think a whole lot.) This is in order to “make sure” it will be “good” the rest of your life. They may also think the “experience” will help them in bed with their future spouse. 

To dispel these lies, I want to start by saying that there is absolutely no way you will be able to tell, no matter how many times you have sex (with whomever) how “good” it will be in the future. The act(s) will not give you any determining factors for that, unless you are thinking of something in the ballpark of physical appearance, and guess what – that changes, too. Not one, nor can any number of sexual experiences in any way hold information as to what future experiences will be like. There are far too many determining factors. For these same reasons, no amount of “experience” is going to help you with your future Mr. or Mrs…a basic sex-ed class will do (you just need to know how things work.) 

In addition, there are a slew of vital details that one must take into consideration before saying, "I literally want to see you every day for the rest of my life. I want to breathe the same air, eat the same food and share the same bed, and, oh yea, everything else." 

If the person is right, the sex will be, too.

I committed enough sexual sin before my marriage to know that it is NOT something I want my daughter to partake in. I want her to know that after my choices (all of which resulting in some form of negativity, high-emotion and/or high-stress situations, and much more that was all, ultimately, pointless.) But, not. Because now I can tell her boldly and with certainty what her mother advises her to do, with sound reasoning. I want her to know that waiting for your husband is wise, healthy, and loving (towards him, though you may not know him yet)

So back to the car. Do you want one with a lot of miles on it? Get zero if you could…wouldn’t you?

If you could ;)

Biblical Submission

 The Biblical view of "submission" unraveled.

Some folks think that the Bible instructs women to submit to their husbands, in turn dismissing all their rights etc. .. that the husband rules the wife with an iron fist .. or in some way they have a negative view about the terms “submit” and "submission."

This view is a misconception, mostly stemming from the Bible being read out of context. If I may...

For starters, the Bible actually instructs us ALL to submit to one another (ref Ephesians 5:21) it repeatedly affirms that all men/women/HUMANS are equal...regardless of age skin color status or gender. (Galatians 3:28, Romans 2:11, John 13:16 to name just a few references)

Moving on, the term "submit" means to CHOOSE to care for and love someone with all your heart...to put them first in your life. (If this sounds odd then I must ask, why get married? Why unless you're saying "I want to know everything about this person, care for them, grow with them in every way and love and respect them, they mean more to me than, me" .. ?

In the marriage institution (Biblically) the husband is representative of Christ, the wife representative of the body (the bride, the entire born again population) so to get married means to display the choice of a partner, a lover, someone you are choosing to become "one" with...and since you are now "one" ... you treat them just as you would treat your own body (ref Ephesians 5:22-33, 1 Corinthians 7:4)

To clarify further... husbands are instructed to love their wives as Christ loved the church...not tell them what to do with their own opinions/hearts (unless guided by God) that way it is not the husband ruling/leading the marriage, it is GOD – Who the wife would be subject to as well. So there is no disputing who rules who. They are perfect equals. So there is a CO-submission going on, a constant act of loving your spouse and putting them first.

So...husbands loving their wives AS Christ loved the church = Christ DIED for the church...laid down His life so that "we might have it more abundantly." (ref John 10:10) Husbands are to live lives in which they have their wife's best interest in mind at all times...to lay down their lives for their woman to symbolize how Christ laid His down for all of us. That, my friends, is also SUBMISSION.

And wives are to want to learn about their husbands...love them actively as he actively loves her also…in whatever way(s) that may be for them.

You don't get married to find flaws in someone or change them to your liking, that is selfish and why (I feel, and sources claim) many marriages end in divorce, because of unrealistic and therefore unmet expectations of the spouse.

In marriage, we get to embrace someone for all that they are (baggage, issues and all) and love them with all our hearts, learn what makes them tick as they do the same with us allowing the marriage bond to grow and truly, "get better with age” in all ways.