The Grand Proposal

My maiden name means "burnt meadow" or "burnt woodland clearing" - shortly after coming to know God, I came to know my husband. My maiden name, fittingly, "burned up" and I took on a new one.

Because of the tradition of swapping names, I actually looked into it to see if it was something I cared to do. Brides originally took the last name of their bridegroom not to show he is greater, but to signify them surrendering their life, their being, to this man, all that he is, and for his love that he will provide for her. The man, likewise, surrenders his very name, and being, to the woman. Extending his existence into another being - hers alone.

Beautiful - at least I think so. Maybe you do, too.

That's because God made man and woman to be a picture of Christ and His Bride (the church - the entire born again population that exists with Him forever) In heaven, God will provide everything, perfectly for everyone, and (of course) know everything...and by definition God is eternal (we were made to learn......about Him.....hence eternity is "set in our hearts") There - this new world (coming after this one is somewhat like a "burnt meadow") this...Heaven we've heard so much about, He will have perfect union with His people.

It is as if God proposed to us...the human race, if we follow the Bible's logic. He gives us a new identity, and we gladly give our lives to Him for it.

Hey - you think maybe that is why men began "popping the question" ... ? Makes it harder to say ... no. ;D !

<3 But God...He is patient.


'All flesh is grass,
    and all its beauty is like the flower of the field.
The grass withers, the flower fades
    when the breath of the Lord blows on it;
    surely the people are grass.
The grass withers, the flower fades,
    but the word of our God will stand forever.'
Isaiah 40:6-8

Dying to Live

On April 3, 2011 - I acknowledged the fact that I had sinned. I acknowledged God's existence. And I knew in my heart of hearts that I wanted something truly pure and beautiful in my life for the first time but also knew I could never manifest that purity and beauty myself. In that same moment, it was as if God answered me in my heart immediately and said, "Me. It is Me." I knew I needed Him more than I needed anything. I wanted Him to take control of my life, and I asked Him to forgive me for everything. For ignoring Him for so long. I gave myself over to Him.

Seconds later, crying, I realized I truly was forgiven because I still felt God's presence and was at total peace; I could literally feel that the weight of my sins and the torment of sins others had committed against me had been lifted from me, this is unexplainable other than the way I just told you. I could even see how He had been with me throughout my life, guiding me, protecting me. And past sins I had buried were cleared up and revealed to me for what they really were.

Months later, I had still done nearly no growing spiritually for many reasons, but to keep this as concise as possible, I will say truly it was because I was not seeking Him. See, I didn't understand how this spiritual life worked. I didn't even realize I was now spirit, or even that Jesus was (is) God and that He was the whole reason I now had communion with God. I had still barely opened a Bible and did not know it was the inerrant word of God (until later). All I knew was that I was different than before and desired new things, but I didn't know what those new things were or how to pursue them. One night though, I read the following verses:

"In the beginning was the Word, and the Word was with God, and the Word was God." John 1:1 

 "And the Word became flesh, and dwelt among us, and we saw His glory, glory as of the only begotten from the Father, full of grace and truth." John 1:14

Now, I only read to "became flesh" of the second verse and then threw my hand over my mouth as if I couldn't believe what I had just read. Tears came to my eyes, I remembered with clarity the Gospel. I can not tell you how many times I heard the Gospel in my life; I can not tell you who told me the Gospel, I might say no more than 5, but in reality, I am totally unsure.) Even though for some reason, I had not understood it before, at that moment, I did. I understood and believed that God had come as a man, Jesus, and died for our sin. That was WHY and HOW I was experiencing the forgiveness and the communion with God. I spent the rest of that night pouring over Bibles and pretty much have ever since. That very night I even researched and wrote about the Temptation Of Jesus, and it was that night I discovered that God had introduced Himself to us in ways I had never imagined. He put on flesh, was born, walked with His feet, worked with His hands, and delivered His body up to death on a cross without uttering one vile word. He lived the only sinless life, being the only one that ever could. He prayed for those who murdered Him. Then, three days after His burial, He rose. To reveal to us that He was God, and He had power over death, and if we believed Him, we would be able to share in His victory over death as well and be granted everlasting life. THIS was the NEW life I had been experiencing, feeling, longing to nurture and make thrive.

I needed truth. God must be worshiped in spirit and in truth. (John 4:24)

Now, backing up a bit, because of this experience and my near no-knowledge rebirth, I had examined myself many times to ensure I was not lying when I said I was born again on 4/3/11 - but as my husband says, the level of knowledge about your salvation does not determine your salvation. The question is, are you saved? Are you born again? I knew that day I had a new nature, but as a newborn, I still needed to grow, and even though I did so extremely slowly (nearly not at all), I feel, during the months leading up to the point I read those verses, I still could tell I was not the same person I used to be as of that day. It is intriguing, but the way I have come to explain it is:

When you are born, do you have any knowledge of what you are? Do you even realize that you are human? No. We know nothing, only that we need the breast; we need milk. We need nourishment; we must live.

When I was born again, I truly was like a little baby, lying there on the floor of my inner being, crying out for milk but circumstances and my lack of knowledge led me to try and continue living as I had been while still just thinking about God on my own, wondering when He would move again, or show me some sign. In fact, He did. Someone did a tarot card reading on me (though now I know this is borderline heresy, hehe, it was "just for fun" - a three-card reading). Not only that, but I was told to "ask the cards a question" - well, I knew these inanimate cards would not give me an answer, but I knew full well God could. So I prayed, "Lord, I do not feel I am on the right path. I want to be on Your path. Please show me that I am on the right path or show me how to get there. I trust You."

The three cards were laid out. They were meant to represent the past, present, and future. I do not remember what the first two cards said. In fact, I basically forgot right after they were read. But the future card resonates with me. It was THE SUN. And the first sentence of the reading: "You will receive a spiritual teacher" - I knew God had used the cards to answer my prayer..and He did - it was He, Himself.

It has been 3 years, 3 months, and 13 days since my rebirth. I have gotten so close to God so fast yet still know I have so very far to go. I have removed myself from the world in many ways, and it has allowed me to meditate on His truths and learn more than I could before. I cannot explain how God has placed me where He has so that I would come to know Him and be with the right people that lead me to this beautiful place in my life. We are burdened by debt and many other issues that, at first, were almost overwhelming for newlyweds with a new baby and no real parenting experience. But with God's help, guidance and love, we persevere and follow Him in faith. I see Him working in our marriage and in the lives of those around us.

As a result of all this, I simply cannot live my life in the same ways I have been. Compassion for others has been set in my heart, one that bloomed the moment I laid eyes on my baby girl. It was as if when I held her and brought her to my chest for the first time, I was holding every human ever born.

We were all babies once.

I know all too well evil is alive and active in this world, as I am sure you do as well, and things are happening that make me weep if I think on them too long. But the greater thing that is happening is that God is saving people, no matter what evil people commit. And the one perfect way He set it all right, the reason He is able to save us, is because He came and died on the cross and rose again. Defeating death and sin. Because of that, we all have a chance to live.

In order to live, though, we must die. What do I mean by this? We must die to ourselves. We all know we are going to die at some point. We can ignore that fact and try and build ourselves up here in this life all we want, but the reality of it will creep in faster than you think, and many people don't even see it coming, but they have known their entire lives, it would certainly come. To prepare for our day of death, we must give our lives over to God; being born again, we can die to ourselves, give up our old ways of life, and seek new ways, righteous ways, and His ways. Only by Him giving us His nature and allowing us to be born of the Spirit are we able to do this. So it is truly a work of God so that none of us can boast. We are all equal in Christ.

I was dying to live before I met God, but in reality, I was just dying. Now, I am alive in the spirit. But by choosing to die to my flesh and live for Him, I am discovering profound truths I never thought possible and seeing the beauty I craved before I met Him, in Him.

Are you dying to live? Try dying to self. If you have not surrendered yourself to God, though, this will be impossible. He will not force you, but He is waiting for you.

Biblical Validity Found Outside the Bible

If you deny Jesus' existence by simply stating you don't believe in the Bible - or don't know how accurate the Bible is - or any other reason based on the Bible's validity - this post is for you.

We have documentation of Jesus' existence, death, and resurrection. And not just in the Bible, there are other accounts from other sources that support and offer more credibility to the life, death and divine nature of Jesus Christ.

Below are some of those accounts - I have highlighted some of my favorite key points.

source (and where you can read more): http://carm.org/non-biblical-accounts-new-testament-events-andor-people

1. "Flavius Josephus (A.D. 37?-101?, a Jewish historian) mentions John the Baptist and Herod--Antiquities, Book 18, ch. 5, par. 2
   1. "Now some of the Jews thought that the destruction of Herod's army came from God, and that very justly, as a punishment of what he did against John, that was called the Baptist: for Herod slew him, who was a good man, and commanded the Jews to exercise virtue, both as to righteousness towards one another, and piety towards God, and so to come to baptism; for that the washing [with water] would be acceptable to him, if they made use of it, not in order to the putting away [or the remission] of some sins [only], but for the purification of the body; supposing still that the soul was thoroughly purified beforehand by righteousness."
2. Flavius Josephus (A.D. 37?-101?) mentions Jesus--Antiquities, Book 18, ch. 3, par. 3.
   1. Now there was about this time Jesus, a wise man, if it be lawful to call him a man; for he was a doer of wonderful works, a teacher of such men as receive the truth with pleasure. He drew over to him both many of the Jews and many of the Gentiles.  He was [the] Christ.  And when Pilate, at the suggestion of the principal men amongst us, had condemned him to the cross, (9) those that loved him at the first did not forsake him; for he appeared to them alive again the third day; (10) as the divine prophets had foretold these and ten thousand other wonderful things concerning him.  And the tribe of Christians, so named from him, are not extinct at this day.
      1. There is debate among scholars as to the authenticity of this quote since it is so favorable to Jesus.  For more information on this, please see Regarding the quotes from the historian Josephus about Jesus
3. Flavius Josephus (A.D. 37?-101?) mentions Ananias the High Priest who was mentioned in Acts 23:2
   1. Now as soon as Albinus was come to the city of Jerusalem, he used all his endeavors and care that the country might be kept in peace, and this by destroying many of the Sicarii.  But as for the high priest, Ananias (25) he increased in glory every day, and this to a great degree, and had obtained the favor and esteem of the citizens in a signal manner; for he was a great hoarder up of money
   2. Acts 23:2, "And the high priest Ananias commanded those standing beside him to strike him [Paul] on the mouth."
4. Pliny the Younger mentioned Christ. Pliny was governor of Bithynia in Asia Minor.  Pliny wrote ten books.  The tenth around AD 112.
   1. "They (the Christians) were in the habit of meeting on a certain fixed day before it was light, when they sang in alternate verses a hymn to Christ, as to a god, and bound themselves by a solemn oath, not to any wicked deeds, but never to commit any fraud, theft or adultery, never to falsify their word, nor deny a trust when they should be called upon to deliver it up; after which it was their custom to separate, and then reassemble to partake of food but food of an ordinary and innocent kind."
      1. Pliny, Letters, transl. by William Melmoth, rev. by W.M.L. Hutchinson (Cambridge: Harvard Univ. Press, 1935), vol. II, X:96 as cited in Habermas, Gary R., The Historical Jesus: Ancient Evidence for the Life of Christ, (Joplin, MO: College Press Publishing Company) 1996.
5. Lucian (circa 120-after 180) mentions Jesus. Greek writer and rhetorician.
   1. "The Christians, you know, worship a man to this day the distinguished personage who introduced their novel rites, and was crucified on that account. . . . You see, these misguided creatures start with the general conviction that they are immortal for all time, which explains the contempt of death and voluntary self-devotion which are so common among them; and then it was impressed on them by their original lawgiver that they are all brothers, from the moment that they are converted, and deny the gods of Greece, and worship the crucified sage, and live after his laws.  All this they take quite on faith, with the result that they despise all worldly goods alike, regarding them merely as common property."
      1. Lucian, The Death of Peregrine, 1113, in The Works of Lucian of Samosata, transl. by H.W. Fowler and F.G. Fowler, 4 vols. (Oxford: Clarendon, 1949), vol. 4, as cited in Habermas, Gary R., The Historical Jesus: Ancient Evidence for the Life of Christ, (Joplin, MO: College Press Publishing Company) 1996.
      2. Though Lucian opposed Christianity, he acknowledges Jesus, that Jesus was crucified, that Christians worship him, and that this was done by faith"

The Bible is a historical document packed with information that is helpful, applicable, and endlessly interesting. Once you take the first four words at face value "In the beginning God.." you can start to read the rest of it in the manner it was intended.

Christ's life, death, and resurrection are not mere bits of history for us to dismiss. They are vital pieces of truth that if we do not come to terms with we will wrestle with for the rest of our lives.

He died, so that we do not have to. His resurrection is the proof and justification of our faith. If we don't believe the words our brothers wrote so long ago - why do we push forward another day reading the words of other men and running them through our filters? Judging them with our faulty minds?

Friends, if we pay no heed to what they decided was so important that we all read - so important they all died for it - then what are you heeding? Who do you trust? People who will die telling you something you don't want to hear or people who will tell you anything to help themselves live?

And no matter what anyone says about Jesus, His actions speak as loud as His words. All the way to the cross. Yet His words were so hard hitting we still have them today.

God is not mocked.

"and while being reviled, He did not revile in return; while suffering, He uttered no threats, but kept entrusting Himself to Him who judges righteously" 1 Peter2:23